Robots with Tentacles

Apparently robots were having a hard time grasping or 'grappling' oddly shaped objects (Like People!) so scientists created a robot with tentacles to grab a greater variety of objects.
Thank heavens for those helpful scientists, for creating Octarm.
And thank DARPA for funding them.

Danger Rating: 7
They are still controlled by people, and don't seem to get around well...Yet.

And This Surprises Who...?

...or should that be, "whom"?

People have finally figured out that an attack by robot drones could pose a serious, possibly unstoppable threat. Apparently, they don't show up on radar as more than a small flock of birds, that is, if they're even noticed at all.

I imagine this could conceivably become the V-1 of the "War on Terrorism". Soon we'll start seeing machine gun nests springing up in cities across the globe as a pre-emptive measure.

Here's the plot of a movie that I can see coming out of this: Ter'ists build a bunch of these things, equipped with explosives, cameras, and full on remote controls. They surreptitiously place wireless repeaters at strategic locations across the city of Washington, D.C. They launch the planes/helicopters from a park in Maryland or Virginia. The controllers are sitting in the Starbucks on the corner across from the Old Executive Office Building. They're sipping cappucino and watching the progress from wireless laptops. To everyone else, it looks like they're playing some online game...

If there are any Hollywood types who want to talk about a script, RSVP in the comments section. I'm looking for at least seven figures here and a big name star. Sam Jackson should be available once Snakes on a Plane wraps. Oh, and I do know the difference between the net and the gross, and the definition of "residuals".

If there are any NSA folks reading this blog, my fellow Doom bloggers and I are available to brainstorm endless scenarios of robotic, er, doom, for the same seven figures mentioned above. You probably have ours numbers already.

Lego Watch continues

If memory serves this was sent in by alert reader Steve Q. They seem to be innocent -- albeit exceptionally time-intensive and bizarre -- Lego construction efforts. Though I'd keep an eye on #3 if I were you.

Danger Rating: 2 (they're still just plastic toys. Right?)

Love-Love Doll 2.0. Better use protection...

I'll let you be the judge of how bad this one is. On the one hand, it's an interesting training tool for health care providers. On the other hand it's, well, a robot birthing machine...

Twins? I'm at a loss for words.

Hal for the home

Now, I certainly understand the appeal of having a robot slave. A robot nanny named Jupiter that looks like Hal doesn't seem too terrible.
But then don't let it "emulate emotions"
Don't let it get on the web.
And seriously, what the hell is with the stake-for-arms stabby things sticking out of it?


Danger Rating: 8
They look harmless and cute, but there's a large potential for damage and destruction here.

Our Hero

Google had the author of How to Survive a Robot Uprising speak as part of their Google Author Series.
The lecture is about 45 minutes long.

Better watch it now, before he is killed and all information about him destoyed.

The Best Intentions Update

Okay, this is it. I hearby declare that this day marks the official start of the clock. The end times are coming people. Get your EMP machines ready. You're going to need them.

It's only a matter of time before the scientists who worked out this little problem turn to each other and ask, "My god, what have we done?"

Danger Rating: 9 This is big. Really big. I mean, now they can simulate life on a whole other level. Pretty soon it'll be moving from simulating a virus to creating a virus that wipes out humanity. The horror. The horror.

Human, machine, what's the difference

While not exactly a demonstration of the doom of humanity, here's an interesting article on why the Turing Test is no good.

For those not in the know, the Turing Test is basically a test of a machine's intelligence, using its ability to communicate like a human. Normally, the test would be designed so that the judge would be at a terminal IM'ing with two or more different 'people' - at least one of whom is a machine. If the judge can't tell which is the human and which is the machine, then the machine must be as smart as a human (a flawed jump, but a key component of the test).

If you don't want to read the article, it basically says that the judges as just as likely to find that real people are machines. Apparently we are not good at spotting 'normal' conversations. Odd. And amusing. If we can't spot 'em when they're just boxes, how will we spot the Terminators, or Cylons...

Robots take on Theatre

So apparently the New York theatre people feel that using human actors it totally 20th Century. They have come up with a play using robots! Yep. They remade to Ibsen classic Hedda Gabler into a story about ailen robots.
The company to create these actors was Botmatrix a small NYC company. They also organized the Robot Parade.

Danger Rating: 4 (apparently they are stopped by such things as 1/4 inch plexiglass on the floor)

Not flying cars, but...

So now they can drive!
I love that the creators are so nervous about a car driving without supervision, that the driver has to touch the wheel every 10 seconds. Like things couldn't possibly go awry in 10 seconds.
But a nice way to get around drinking and driving!

Danger Rating: 8 (Cars with people driving are dangerous. Cars with homicidal robots driving are just wrong).

It's a robot, It's a rescuer, It's Snakebot!

Snakebot? Seriously? I mean really, imagine this: Your in a building that has collapsed, you're trapped, scared, dirty... and what do you see but a robotic snake coming at you! Do you feel better? or worse? hmm
http://crasar.csee.usf.edu/MainFiles/oct02_02.htm

See the robots are your friends!

Danger Rating: 1 (The robots are so helpful and good!)

More trouble at Lego...

...and now Google...

I've expressed some concern about Lego the company and how they have unmonitored robot trucks moving around their factories. Now, I see they have a relatively new line of Legos, wherein the heroes are guys in giant "mechas" fighting evil robot-driven mechas (so yes, they're each driving giant robots, but it's the humans versus other robots). Well, at least they've adequately described the intentions of the robots, but is the whole thing a smokescreen to cover up the factory robots' plans? Danger Rating: 2 (Though the situation clearly bears watching...)

In other, more disturbing news, I found this article from CNNmoney that explains that in the (near) future, a "Strong AI" (a computer program capable of upgrading its own code) is far more likely to come out of "google-like data-mining" than a robotics lab. *Gulp* I mean, we're talking Google here people. Everything they touch like... works... and is accepted and popular. They're like the anti-Microsoft. Though since Google also owns Blogger I don't think they're going to let me get to the Danger Rating: 9, which I place on the high end of the scale for the reasons I just listed...

Technology Explained!

From Homestarrunner.com. A brief primer on technology, as explained by Strongbad.

I'd keep my eye on that The Cheatbot. He looks a little shady...

Well, things are really picking up...

...now that I'm not the only one posting, eh? (Or at least the robots will have more than one target to acquire, anyway...)

So a few different things today. First a bit of random humor (?) from a fictional character, brought to my attention by the original Webb.

Next, buried deep down in this news item about our friends at Sony Corp, is the tidbit that they are going to stop producing the Aibo robo-dog. Make of that what you will, but perhaps their plans to infiltrate our homes as thinly disguised "pets" has fallen through.

And finally, beware the receptionist... no longer a cute blonde you can flirt with...

Maybe if we ask nicely they'll take the Hippocratic oath...

A pleasant good day to all you talking monkeys.

As the second addition to The Best Intentions, I offer this morsel from the BBC concerning robotic surgical helpers. Developers have created tiny, highly maneuverable robots that can assist in laproscopy, etc. The idea being that the bots will enable surgeons to perform invasive procedures with less cutting and fumbling around inside the body.

Now, here's where I see it going awry. Remember the X-Files episode where someone implanted lots of nanobots into ADA Skinner's bloodstream? Remember how that rat bastard Krycek was able to control the nanobots with his PDA so that Skinner would writhe in pain as his veins turned all Star Trek Borg-ish? No? You stopped watching the show after Season 5? Tool.

If I have to spell it out for you: Tiny robot implanted into human. Tiny robot releases nanobots. Nanobots travel through bloodstream and lodge in brain of "host". (Think of the movie The Mummy when the scarab beetle burrows into that guy's brain.) Oh hell, you see where this is going. The robots don't even have to take us out--they can control us through the implants so that we take out each other. Or, at the very least, we become their lobotomized slaves.

Danger Rating: 7 (Unlike nanobot technology, this stuff is closer to being a reality, and once a human becomes a host to the bot, how do you easily tell if he's under robot control? On the plus side, the fact that the X-Files (and Star Trek) have been subtley warning folks of such a possiblity for over a decade, I'm sure there are people working on countermeasures. Still, this does not bode well for the future.)

Best of luck on your procedure...

Here's One that started as a bad idea

Meat Eating Robots.
Meat Eating Robots that are mobile.
Meat Eating Mobile Robots with teeth.
Meat Eating Mobile Robots with teeth that have sensors to locate, and gather food.
http://www.gastrobots.com/

I don't care that they call it Chew Chew. It is not your friend.

And when you combine it with Dr. Wilkinson other projects regarding robots that climb fences, walk up stairs, climb trees and poles you get the idea that perhaps Dr. Wilkinson has never watched a science-fiction movie in his life.

Danger Rating: 5 (The robot is still trapped in a laboratory, and cannot hunt. Yet)

I'm Sure It Started As A Good Idea...

Greetings carbon blobs.

For my first post, I'd like to start a featured list that I will hereby refer to as The Best Intentions. This list will be composed of links to articles featuring new technology that, carried to it's logical conclusion, will one day assuredly lead to the destruction of humanity, or at the very least, subjugation from our future robot overlords. I will also be grading each technology on a scale of 1 to 10 with relation to it's potential danger to humanity. 1 meaning, "Shyeah. I'm SOOOO scared little robot! Beat it before I feed you to my Furbie." 10 meaning, "I for one welcome our Robot Overlords and remind them that I can be quite useful in distributing propaganda while the rest of humanity toils in the mines."

To begin the list, I offer this informative piece concerning the invention of nanomotors, which appear from the description to be microscopic generators capable of powering nanotechnology. Best of all, they run on solar power.

You may ask why I have added this to the list. If I have to spell it out for you then here it is: In the future, the swarms of robot nano-assassins that will undoubtedly rule the skies will now be able to rove freely during the daylight hours without ever needing to stop and refuel.

Danger Rating: 5 (What works for them also works for us, and with the advance warning I'm providing, someone somewhere with an iota of sense will start working on countermeasures pronto. And at least we'll have a fighting chance after sundown.)

Don't say I didn't warn you.

They're just plastic toys, right?

Alert reader Nathan D. sent in the following:

Stumbled across this with StumbleUpon for Firefox, and thought it was cool enough to share.
It kind of worries me that they have Robot Trucks receiving radio commands from Computer controlled Molding Machines... That, and they fact that humans are only really involved at the end of the process, to make sure there aren't any "Kill all Humans" notes in the boxes. Kinda scary, for those robo-phobes out there.

But hey, it's just Legos, right? Right?

And while we focus on robots here at Robot Doom, we also like to occasionally point out the "potential" folly of all "Weird Science," so for our first Weird Science Alert: we bring this exciting tale of Glowing Green Pigs brought to our attention by alert reader Steve Q.

Some old links I had...

...lying around, plus a new piece of "humor" courtesy of WPE.

First, I know you probably all saw this creepy one, but I was going through my email archives trying to find the ones I hadn't used yet...

Asimo is up to more trouble...

And here's a bit o' "humor" courtesy of McSweeney's, by way of WPE.

Art?

I suppose they think that makes them cultured...? It's a slippery slope, I tells ya...

Oh, and since they don't have enough advantages over us carbon-based lifeforms, let's give 'em a third eye...

This one just makes me cringe. I can't even make up a joke. (But ya gotta love the headline...)

More to come, I'm sure...