We're Here, We're Que--, Um, Robots, Get Used to Us

As readers of science fiction had predicted long ago, members of the British government have finally caught on to the imminent robot threat and have even written a speculative paper "warning that robots may one day demand their emancipation from humans."

Here's how it works: Humans create smart robots to do human work. Robots eventually become smarter and smarter until they actually achieve a level of self-awareness. Robots strike and demand equal benefits for them and their spouses. (Okay, so that last part was a bit of a stretch, but you see where this is going. It's all about the sanctity of marriage, people! What if your children see the robots engaging in their, er, robot ways? They may catch the gay, I mean, robot. Pretty soon it'll be armageddon!)

I suppose we should be comforted that this originated from a somewhat noteworthy authority. Perhaps it's a pre-emptive strike against the Cybermen, Daleks, and Autons who will no doubt overrun England in the future. At least if we can believe what we see on Dr. Who.